U Can't Touch This

Well, actually apparently you can touch this. That was the song that came on as I entered the stage for my T-walk yesterday afternoon at the Maine Event. I'm so glad I didn't choose my own song because I don't think any of my choices would have been more fitting than that one...in more aspects in life than just competing LOL! As I walked out there I felt super confident walking to the beat of the music but once I got to the right corner of my T the volume on the music seemed to die down and I lost that edge I needed to finish out confidently. I ended up forgetting to do my back pose on the right corner and making up for it on the left corner which totally threw off my mental game and I walked off feeling defeated. My friends and family who were watching said they couldn't tell  that I wasn't doing exactly what I had practiced but I'm a perfectionist to the extreme and there's nothing worse than letting yourself down.

Front pose, stage right of T-walk

The reason I say you can touch this is because I did not do nearly as well as I had expected to overall and can't help but feel a bit disappointed in myself. It's hard to get someone to understand where I'm coming from with this point of view because I did place consistently in both of my categories, 3rd novice and 3rd open. However, in my mind that's like saying that after 5 months of competing I'm no better than I was at my first show, and I know that's not the case at all. I am not shocked with the top #5 placings at all. In fact, the two girls who I anticipated to be my strongest competition were in fact the two that beat me out for the 1st and 2nd spot in the open category. It was the novice category I am more confused about. I honestly don't even remember who got spot #2 so I'll have to wait to see when the placings get posted. When all is said and done though, I know that I brought a great package, easily my best yet, and there's absolutely nothing I can do about what else gets brought to the stage. Given that social media is an easy way to get yourself in trouble (i.e. I seem to always be digging myself a deeper hole with my broadcasted opinions and attempts at sarcasm) I will say only one final thing about the Maine Event: every single one of my competitors looked amazing and their hard work was beyond evident. It was easily my toughest competition yet. I know I can do better and look forward to coming back stronger and stronger each time. That being said, bikini is supposed to resemble an all-around package. A lean, toned physique, feminine and classy stage presence, appropriate color, jewelry and makeup, and confident but not cocky attitude. I didn't feel that this was necessarily the case in all of the placings. But that's just my opinion.

Group comparison, open class A (I'm second from right)

Moving on now. I refuse to beat myself up by over-thinking things anymore today. I have one thing on my mind now and that is the Cape Cod Classic in 2 weeks! After a delicious post-show cheat meal of chicken pad Thai and some pinot grigio, I woke up early this morning ready to get back on plan! I had a declicious egg sandwich for breakfast with a whole wheat Ezekiel english muffin, 1 whole egg, 4 egg whites, roasted red peppers, baby spinach, garlic and fresh mozzarella as well as a nice big mug of my favourite pumpkin spice coffee! After taking Mugsy for a short walk I then hit the gym for a bi's and tri's routine. Having stayed out pretty late last night I wasn't fully energized but I still managed to push out a great workout. My goal right now is to come in leaner for the next show. At this point its all about diet as it's unlikely I will gain any muscle during this time. I just need to keep up with the lifts to maintain my current level of muscle and keep following my diet plan. My no-dairy experiment hasn't seemed to make any difference in my physique whatsoever. I'm going to continue to follow it for this next and last show of the year but I probably won't bother next time around. Eating meat 6x a day is really quite boring. I never thought I could miss plain Greek yogurt so much LOL! 

Anyway, I need to get some chores done and take Mugsy for a long walk as my apology for having zero energy to give him much exercise over the past week. Poor pup! Here's a pic of me, my friend Amy who I helped pose over the past few weeks as it was her first show ever and a couple of new friends I made yesterday. These shows are such a great way to meet like-minded people! Now that the pre-game is over, time to clamp down for the real deal. T-13 days...

Cleaning House!